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War of the Genders

A confrontational soapbox for rants and politically incorrect manifestos regarding feminism, chauvinism, dating and gender issues.

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Location: Jerusalem, Israel

This isn't a dating site. If you wish to propose marriage or to beat me up, leave me a note.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Feelings

Stop me if you heard this one: A girl says she doesn't have sex on the first date or week of early relationship, then she jumps in bed with the next guy she meets almost instantly. Or how about the rule 'I will only sleep with a man I love', or 'I will never date my co-worker or friend's ex-boyfriend', or 'I will not go to a man's house until after a few weeks of a relationship', or 'I want it to be right the first time', etc etc...

Back in the dark ages, I used to respect some of these wet blankets of presumed modesty and actually liked a woman with some so-called morals. That is, until I found out they were ad-hoc excuses attempting to appeal to my sense of logic and structure, while the truth was that I just didn't make her feel right. And oh, there are so many ways to make a woman feel right. What a fool I was.

Of course most men have no desire for such quaint ideas as morals and, to the noble goal of getting into another pair of panties, the unenlightened ones actually argue with things like 'but you know me for more than two weeks already!'...and other such feeble arrows of proud male logic.

But how do you expect anyone to respect these rules when they have no absolute ground to stand on, and, perhaps more importantly, you don't abide by them yourselves? I'm sorry, but the world does not revolve around your little palpitating orbs of emotions.

And now that the female gender is outspoken about its desires and feelings, what with all the TV shows, movies and open forums, you had better shape up because now that we know you better, we're out to manipulate you even more. And although most men are too dumb to leverage or even understand this new widespread knowledge, for every dumb man there is a dumber or younger girl out there who is more malleable.

You were probably better off being 'mysterious' and quiet.

As an aside, men, as usual, are much simpler: As soon as they get an erection, any rule that they may have created in a New Year resolution spirit or post-coital nobility is usually thrown out the window. You know what? Men feel cheap after cheap sex as well, they just don't care, or they repress it with beer, bravado, the next cheap sexual adventure and by blaming it on the 'slut' they slept with. But lets go back to discussing you women...

The ironic thing is that your feelings and intuitions are often very well-based in practicality and truth, but this same power of yours undermines itself when lacking in ballast of another nature. How often have you done something that felt right, then regretted it aftewards? How often has a manipulative man made you feel foolish? How often have you been blinded by your own desires?

So here is my advise to you airheaded women: First, learn how to express your feelings in a language that won't make you look fickle and foolish (in other words, don't make up rules you don't intend to keep). Second, learn to trust, question and analyze your feelings better so that you aren't swayed back and forth like a dithering swan in a ballet. Third, find some solid, qualified, logical argument for your justified feelings that isn't based only on a flutter of your heart so that your man will be able to respect and understand your needs instead of toying with them.

Until then, I will manipulate you as necessary because you obviously don't know any better.

3 Comments:

Blogger Loreley said...

Your advice sounds good in theory, but isn't practical. It doesn't take into consideration the female motives for sex. (Here's a challenge for you. Find out what they are!)

October 07, 2004 8:42 pm  
Blogger Baron said...

I don't understand this comment. What makes you think I don't understand or look for their motivations? How can I even be manipulative if I wanted to without understanding motivations. Women have many, many motivations for having sex and if I want sex, the first thing I'll do is understand her specific motivations.

Was this your attempt at being mysterious?

October 08, 2004 1:01 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Touché

November 30, 2007 6:02 am  

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